Yes it's been a while. I've really tried my hardest to pretend like I don't have anything wrong with me which is really the opposite of what I'm supposed to be doing. Really I should be embracing my difference and using my vast knowledge gained from my fellow lymies and trudging ahead. Alas, I pretended for the past couple months as though there was nothing wrong.
Did this set me back? Well, ok, maybe the handful of nights I allowed myself to "go wild" and have a couple drinks (enough to make me a happy go lucky person) was counter productive. Maybe, the couple nights, ok maybe a bit more then a couple nights where I stayed out all night by drinking a redbull every hour just so that I could watch the sun rise on a beautiful summer night with my feet propped up on the beautiful brick fire pit that I built in the back yard wasn't the best idea for someone who has issues waking up in the morning.
I WAS A NORMAL 27 YEAR OLD for just a month. Just one month did I go all out. Yes I accepted the repercussions that lasted for days... ok weeks... but still it was all worth it to live again and honestly the fact that I was able to do it drug free (ummm mostly if you don't count the drinks) means something! I would not have been able to do that this time last year.
Now that I am done with my guilt trip on myself. Specially given my fatigue these past couple weeks... I'm not complaining still it really was worth it. I'll get onto the better stuff.
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